I always like the wrong people and then IM the one who ends up crying. EVERY single one of them always have said "I wont make you cry I promise" That's shit. I guess I need a stronger wall. The people who want to be in will climb it and others will let me slip away. I guess I shouldn't let it bother me but I cant help stupid emotions. They come and go and they don't stay like anyone stays anyway so big deal I guess. But im not afraid of it I refuse to be afraid of these people who think they're grown up and responsible, when in all reality no one is responsible. We'll see the winners in the end and then I will know. But until then I wont be worried im only nineteen and I have room to grow...hell everyone has room to grow if you don't have room and you're closed minded you might as well not be living at all I guess.
Love is a big word...and I've learned a lot but also, Hate is a strong word and the only people I think should be hated are Rapists, murderers (unless its in self defense) or anyone committing a serious crime of harmful manners. So love nor hate are appropriate words for people at a young age or early on in a relationship it gets you in deeper then needed.
Womp.
Some friends and myself are talking about moving to San Diego after colleges and such and I want to. Its all the way across the united states and away from everything that I know. I mean worst comes to worse if we crash and burn we crash together. Its a little close to Mexico like probably an hour drive from Mexico and a 4 hour drive to LA but it'll be nice and well have some great adventures there. And in all if it doesn't work out we can always come back to Philadelphia. So for me that will be in 5 years which is exciting I'm excited for adventures and I get really bad anxiety so hopefully maybe that will scare the anxiety out of me because its a big step.It'll be interesting to see where we will all be in 5 years with our lives.
I am applying to Uarts soon for either illustration or graphic design im not sure which yet but im working on it. Art is a lot of my life and I think its possible for anyone to become an artist, well everyone is an artist in their own way I believe. I just need to work on detail and get education in. Ive never had a formal art class other then elementary school which impresses a lot of people. I was accepted into Moore college of art and design and will go there unless Uarts is cheaper which I kind of hope Uarts is cheaper, but well see. I can't wait to learn I've been out of school for a year and will be more then a year when I go back and I can't wait to see how it goes. I have matured more and im willing to take school more seriously because now I'll be learning about something im interested in and not being forced to sit in a room because of society.
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